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Everything posted by Koach
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Here's a picture of a sunset from my parent's house in North Carolina. It is always cloudy there, so this was as good as I could get. I also got a picture of the spider from their deck.
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A lawyer defending a man accused of burglary tried a creative defense to get his client off the hook. "My client merely inserted his arm into the window and removed a few paltry items. His arm is not himself, so I fail to see how you can punish the whole individual for an offense committed soley by his arm." "Well put," the judge replied with a grin. "Using that same logic, I sentence the defendant's arm to one year's imprisonment. Your client can accompany the arm or not, as he chooses." The defendant smiled. Then, with his lawyer's help, the burgler detatched his artificial limb, laid it on the bench and walked out.
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"Let's jump on board, and cut them to pieces." -Blackbeard
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/me throws his peg leg at smiley
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A poet and a scientist were traveling together on a plane. The scientist was bored and said to the poet, "Hey, you, do you want to play a game? I'll ask you a question, and if you get it wrong, you give me $5. Then, you ask me a question, and if I can't answer it, I'll give you $5." The poet thought about this for a moment, but he decided against it, seeing that the scientist was obviously a very bright man. He politely turned down the scientist's offer. The scientist, who was really bored, tried again. "Look, I'll ask you a question, and if you can't answer it, you give me $5. Then you ask me a question, and if I can't answer it, I'll give you $50." The poet agreed. "Okay," the scientist said, "what is the exact distance between the Earth and the Moon?" The poet, obviously not knowing the answer, didn't stop to think about the scientist's question. He took a $5 bill out of his pocket and handed it to the scientist. The scientist happily accepted the bill and promptly said, "Okay, now it's your turn." The poet thought about this for a few minutes, then asked, "All right, what goes up a mountain on three legs, but comes down on four?" The bright glow quickly vanished from the scientist's face. He thought about this for a long time, taking out his notepad and making numerous calculations. He finally gave up on his notepad and took out his laptop, using his Multimedia Encyclopedia. As the plane was landing the scientist gave up. He reluctantly handed the poet a $50 bill. The poet accepted it graciously, getting ready to stand up. "Wait!" the scientist shouted, "you can't do this to me! What's the answer?" The poet looked at the scientist and calmly put a $5 bill into his hand.
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Sherlock Holmes and Dr. Watson went on a camping trip. As they lay down for the night, Holmes said:” Watson, look up into the sky and tell me what you see?" Watson said, "I see millions and millions of stars." Holmes: "And what does that tell you?" Watson: "Astronomically, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies and potentially billions of planets. Theologically, it tells me that God is great and that we are small and insignificant. Meteorogically, it tells me that we will have a beautiful day tomorrow. What does it tell you?" Holmes: "Somebody stole our tent."
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I think it's great they are commemorating his birthday but I think the stamp itself is kind of ugly.
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I found this article here: http://forums.delphi...stamps/messages In 2012, the U.S. Postal Service commemorates the 150th anniversary of the birth of O. Henry (the pen name of William S. Porter, 1862-1910) with a stamp in its Literary Arts series. The short stories of O. Henry are beloved for their irony and skillful unfolding of plot; often, they end with a surprise twist. This prolific author wrote nearly 300 tales, most in the final eight years of his life. By the time of his death, he was the most widely read storyteller in America and was internationally admired. In the stamp art, the author’s portrait is set against a background image of the elevated rail in New York City, where many of O. Henry’s stories were set. The portrait is based on a photograph of the author as a young man that dates to the late 1880s. The dominant sense of comedy is unmistakable in O. Henry’s work. One of his most popular stories, “The Gift of the Magi,” tells of a young married couple on Christmas Eve: Della has one treasure, her long hair, which she has cut off and sold to buy Jim a chain for his heirloom watch — which he, in turn, has sold to buy her a fine set of combs. This tale suggests that human goals can be frustrated despite good intentions, yet Jim and Della are seen as admirable because of the sacrifices they make for love. Explanations for how he chose his pen name vary, and Porter gave different answers when people asked. “O. Henry” may be a condensation of “Ohio State Penitentiary,” where Porter served a sentence for embezzlement before becoming known as a writer. The O. Henry Prize Stories, an anthology published annually since 1919, testifies to his continuing influence on American letters. After his death, his friends established the yearly collection to honor him and to encourage the ongoing development of the art of the short story. The first stamp in the Literary Arts series was issued in 1979; O. Henry is the 28th writer to be honored in the series. Art director and stamp designer Ethel Kessler worked with artist Cap Pannell on his first stamp illustration for O. Henry. It is being issued as a Forever® stamp, which is always equal in value to the current First-Class Mail one-ounce rate.
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Happy Birthday DanX!
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really nice pictures. I'll try to get one from my parents back deck tonight.
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Happy Birthday, CHARMY_JUN!
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Mr. Marlow was strolling through the country when he saw a stable with the most beautiful horse he ever laid eyes on. It was seventeen hands high and white, with rippling muscles and a fine, flowing mane. Mr. Marlow struck a deal to buy it from the owner who did, however, pass on one key piece of information. "We are a religious family, Mr.Marlow, and we've instilled those values in our horse. To get him to gallop you must say 'Thanks God' to get him to stop you must say 'Our Father Who Art in Heaven," Settling into the saddle, Marlow said " Thanks God," and the animal took off. They rode for miles; suddenly they were coming up to a cliff. Unfortunately, Marlow couldn't remember the phrase to make the animal stop and tried every Biblical passage he could think of until, just a few feet from the edge of the cliff, he shouted, " Our Father Who Art in Heaven! The animal stopped instantly. Shaking and perspiring, Marlow reached into his pocket and pulled out a handkerchief. "Thanks God," he said as he mopped his brow...
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lol, i didn't expect that punchline
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Wow engines, that sunset is really unusual. Was there a storm moving in?
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Happy birthday Smiley!
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Nice photo Dodge. We should have a Most Beautiful Sunset contest. But, how could we tell who copied and pasted from some professional photographer website?
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That sounds like it would have a really interesting taste. I'll definately put this on my cooking to-do list. Thanks Casa
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